Last year, it was the same Priyanka who used to be stuck to her laptop or phone screen to chat with her friends. She had even angrily asked her, “Priyanka, if you constantly stay online, how will you manage to maintain your relations with the people around you?”
Priyanka and Sameer had come to Hyderabad a year after their wedding to meet her aunt. They lovingly addressed her as ‘Taisaheb’. Priyanka had decided to leave for Pune to meet her mother but Taisaheb insisted on Priyanka paying her a visit. Thus, Priyanka decided to make a halt at Hyderabad before heading for Pune. There was no doubt that she was happy to see Taisaheb who loved Priyanka like she loved her own daughters. During her stay in Hyderabad, she was telling Taisaheb about her family members when her phone began ringing.
“Oh, It’s my brother-in-law calling me. I haven’t been able to talk to him throughout the day today,” exclaimed Priyanka, and began talking over the phone. After talking to her brother-in-law, she spoke to his wife too. Once she was done talking to both of them, she said to Taisaheb, “I’ll talk to my in-laws as well and get done with today’s phone conversations so that I can dedicate my entire time to you thereafter. I’m so sorry!”
Taisaheb rose and went to the kitchen, leaving Priyanka at the dining table by herself. While preparing Malai Kofta, Taisaheb thought about how last year, it was the same Priyanka who used to be stuck to her laptop or phone screen to chat with her friends.
“Taisaheb, I do nothing beyond checking my updates and accepting a few friend requests after which I logout from Facebook. I work on my project on my laptop.
I merely use Facebook for 15 minutes,” said Priyanka, trying to explain herself to her aunt. Taisaheb herself knew the power of Facebook and how it brought people closer. She had been using Facebook for a few months. She was part of a group that appreciated music. She made it a point to check her Facebook at least twice a day and post songs of her favourite artistes namely, Asha Bhosle and Mukesh. However, when someone posted eminent singer Lata Mangeshkar’s song, it was difficult for her to resist listening to it. She had made sure there was nobody from her school staff on her friend list. She wouldn’t like her school staff gossiping about her status updates. Taisaheb made sure that she did not while away her time on Facebook chatting with friends like the younger generation did. She was aware of the fact that she had been using Facebook regularly but made sure that nobody would get to know about it. Lost in thoughts, Taisaheb was brought back to her senses with the sound of the ovengoing off. She began to peel the potatoes which she had just taken out of the oven. Once Priyanka was done talking to everybody over the phone, she came to the kitchen and gave Taisaheb a tight hug.
“I just spoke to my mother-in-law and she said that all the seven members in our house should talk to each other at least once throughout the day.”
“Who are these seven people?” Taisaheb interrupted Priyanka, and asked her. “Sameer and I, brother-in-law Ankit, his wife’s mother-in-law, father-in-law and granny. My mother-in-law says that keeping in touch with your family members makes it easy to rely on one another and develop a stronger family bond. It also helps us feel closer to one another regardless of the distance.”
“You mean updating one another of your respective lives is similar to the way we put up status updates for our friends on Facebook,” asked Taisaheb, whose innocence made Priyanka laugh and she was surprised with the fact that her aunt too used Facebook. “You are on Facebook too,” Priyanka excitedly asked Taisaheb. “As far as I remember, you despised the use of social media. What brought about a change in you?” Taisaheb replied to Priyanka’s question saying, “I don’t know. It feels nice. I like listening to music online and keeping in touch with a few people. However, I have noticed that your mother-in-law has aced the art of operating social media. She seems to have beaten Mark Zuckerberg himself. Times have changed and everyone has become busy in their own lives!”
“However, there is another kind of Facebook which has been used by people since ages. My grandmother used to operate her version of Facebook with the help pen and paper. Postcards and written letters held a different sentiment altogether,” said Taisaheb to Priyanka, and got lost in fond memories from her younger days. She recalled how her mother would do everything possible to try and maintain the bond between her daughters and daughters-in-laws. Her daughters were married and stayed with their husbands and in-laws. As soon as all the household chores were completed, she would make her daughters-in-law write to their sisters-in-law.
“Girls, please sit down and prepare postcards for your sister-in-laws. Tell them that we’ve just chopped raw mangoes and placed them under the sun. We’ll prepare pickle for them when they’re here.” She went on and told her younger daughter-in-law Rajvi, to write to her daughter Suvarna. “Write to her and tell her to bring her mother-in-law along as well this time. We have a small house but a huge heart. There is no need to worry,” Taisaheb’s mother would say.
This helped the girls in updating one another of their lives. Taisaheb’s mother was particular about strengthening the bond between her daughters and daughters-in-law. Once her mother was done telling her daughter-in-laws what to write, they would add a few lines to their letters by themselves too. The letters were a medium for her mother to stay in touch with her daughters as well as bring them closer to her daughter-in-laws. It hadn’t struck Taisaheb even once that, her mother was the one behind all the letters that she used to receive from her brothers’ wives, until much later. “Were those postcards any lesser of updates than today’s Facebook updates?” Taisaheb got nostalgic and said,“Your mother-in-law is doing a great job of keeping her family members tied together in a strong bond,” said Taisaheb as she added the koftas to the curry. “Exactly! I too love speaking with everyone and keeping in touch with them. My day doesn’t feel complete without talking to my loved ones,” replied Priyanka. “It is the same feeling when you forget to like something on Facebook, isn’t it,” Taisaheb jokingly asked Priyanka, and both of them burst out into laughter.
